Hot damned, was I looking forward to seeing this movie. When I first saw the announcement, the book cover alone got me all riled up.
And then the teasers came out?
Man, I was pumped. Deep down inside I knew it would probably be dumb, but I also wanted to just embrace the bad for the sake of having fun.
What kills me is not that this movie sucked (as if you hadn’t guessed my opinion by now). What really sucks about it is the fact that it could have so easily been good.
It’s supposed to be a good book, so I guess it’s only natural that the movie would suck. But still, it would have been so simple not to fuck this one up.
But they did it.
A little more than half way through the movie, you will completely cease to care what happens, impatiently waiting for the end of the film, which can’t come too soon.
It’s like they borrowed a page from Danny Boyle’s “Sunshine”: they establish a super interesting world, give you compelling, complex characters with rich histories, the story is on track to be great just the way everything is set up, and then suddenly, out of nowhere, and completely unnecessarily, something completely unexpected comes in, confusing everything and fucking it all up.
HEY, HOLLYWOOD. HERE’S A FUCKING HINT: IF YOU DON’T NEED THE RANDOM AND HARD-TO-EXPLAIN PLOT TWIST, DON’T FUCKING PUT IT IN THE MOVIE.
Aside from curve ball plot-twists, the film repeatedly resorts to cheap emotional manipulation to pull you in, another thing that was completely unnecessary. The term ham-fisted comes to mind. As subtle as a fucking baseball bat to the skull.
And if you’re not offended yet, the overt religiosity at the end just compounds the whole thing.
And the Bob Marley thing? Bob Marley wanted to inject love and music into people’s lives, like serum in a test subject? Did he really make that analogy? Ass.
After much debate over dinner, it was decided that the film was actually the sum of three different versions of the story that the screenwriter had pitched to the studios, the worthwhile parts no doubt rapidly vetoed by committee, the shittier ones forcefully appended.
If, for whatever reason, you find yourself unable to avoid going to see this, leave half way through. Feign illness if you must. You’ll be leaving with a fond memory of the film, and none of the impending disgust and disappointment.
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7 responses so far ↓
1 Mali Elfman // Dec 17, 2007 at 9:29 am
It’s not like it’s I Robot or something…I didn’t love it but I do not agree with you that it was that bad. And what plot twists are you talking about? Because they did actually justify what I think you’re talking about oh angry one
2 Jeff // Dec 17, 2007 at 10:03 am
I’d have to agree with Mali, this film is not great but it’s better than, oh I don’t know, Space Invaders, it’s from 1990 I think, check out this crappy film, then weight it against I Am Legend, and decide.
3 Louis // Dec 17, 2007 at 12:35 pm
My whole point is simply this:
A film without any redeeming qualities is bad. If it flat out fails, that’s not good.
But a film that could so easily be good and yet somehow fucks it all up, well that’s a lot worse.
4 Karl // Dec 17, 2007 at 3:56 pm
I enjoyed the flick . Thought it was well paced and well acted (well, given its only Will Smith 2/3 of the movie) but the end was a bit too rushed for my liking.
5 Robert // Dec 17, 2007 at 9:19 pm
Huh?
6 Chris Luna // Dec 17, 2007 at 10:43 pm
Even though a lot of people have reviewed this movie and called it crap, I still want to see it even if it has a stupid title.
7 georgina // Dec 18, 2007 at 3:09 am
Will Smith is over here in the UK now promoting the film and having seen the trailers all I can say is that the old adage about working with kids and animals looks set to apply here. the German Shepherd stole the scene! so that will definitely go and see it. ( good to see he made the poster )
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