I’ve seen the future of T.V. and it isn’t pretty. While scrolling the channels the other day, I came across a show whose title alone made me laugh out loud. Pants Off ~ Dance Off ! Feeling like I’d won the sick-on-the-couch lottery, I eagerly clicked on Fuse TV. There I saw a girl who I’m pretty sure hasn’t gotten her period yet shoving her butt into the camera to the beat of some lame Justin Timberlake song. Oh, I thought, they really meant pants off. Dance off. Okay. I screamed so loud that my husband ran into the room. He sat down on the couch next to me. We stared at the television, each making various snorting sounds but not even our indignant head shaking could make us turn away from the big screen. It was like a car wreck. No, wait, it was like reading about Britney Spears. You want to stop the crazy but you can’t! It is just too good.

It wasn’t until the commercial break that we were able to form coherent sentences. Pants Off -Dance Off is a wonder. It is so horrible and unbelievable that it is utterly awesome. I cannot believe that it exists. Here’s the ‘plot’: five dancers (baby strippers) dance around and drop trou. Two real life strippers serve as judges. Shazam. Television at its dumbest and somehow its best. Have I said holy crap yet? If not, holy crap!

So, since then I’ve been wondering… if the Writer’s Guild strike continues, could this be what we’re in store for? Is this what I got cable for, after two years of blissful ignorance about television programming? If this is the future of T.V., is it also the end of the world? And, if I were still single and in college, would I have gone on this horror of a show? Don’t answer that.

*You can see this miracle every Tuesday night on Fuse. Or, if you’re lucky, you might catch a marathon! (crossing fingers)

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