Mercedes Benz Smashbox Studios Fashion Week Los Angeles, 2008. It’s that time of the season again, when temporary insanity takes over ordinarily level headed minds. That time of year which might find one semi-questioning personal fashion taste and style. And how could one not like it? Fashionistas flock to gaga over it, so why shouldn’t you?
I am not your average glamour magazine reader or fashion trend follower; having been a runway and fit model for over a decade, I am well trained by the last of the old-school glamour crowd. Working for both domestic and European cultures taught me to appreciate my duel personality, recognizing my personal style. Modeling I went for what I liked, at which I was constantly turned down and sent back to the classics and Haute Couture, where I began. Classifications best suited for my look and body type.
I have learned many things throughout the fashion years, and want to share them with you. Although you and I won’t always agree, my views are based upon classic rules my mentors taught me.
All that glitters is not always gold, as all that is style was definitely never fashion! Stylish garments are clothes, but fashion is an appreciation of flattery. Style covers you, while fashion is meant to flatter whatever shape the body happens to be.
Over all, style dictates fashion, and fashion sense. Yes, that dress really does makes you look fat! If you have any doubts, don’t buy the garment to begin with. You will always feel self-conscious, and will never truly enjoy wearing it. As far as fashion trends; it’s wise to remember that trends, like all good things caught in the moment, eventually end.
- No matter how expensive, sneakers have a place and time for wear.
- See-through tops should always be paired with a full cup bra.
- The classic trench is full length, silk, and fully lined, not midi or chemically treated.
- And yes, my wool winter scarf will keep my neck warm as I shiver and turn blue in my lightweight summer tee. What?
Oh Coco Chanel and Giovanni Versace, where are you?
Keeping in true Hollywood fashion… And now, on with the show!
The LA FASHION WEEK 2008 LAUNCH:
Veronika Jeanvie: “For art and art’s sake alone will I live this wretched life?”
There are artists, and then there are designers. This year merged bold colors with Picasso abstracts, minus the shoulder pads. Several designers came close to success, while others can be summed up in a few simple words - UFO vomit:
Pardon me, but did you get the license plate of that UFO that barfed on my crotch? Excuse me, but did you say that you wanted to get laid, ever?
While I did like a few pieces, overall the patterns were too bold for my confidence. I couldn’t help but wonder about the inspiration, and how on earth they found that perfect material. Or was it the material which found and inspired them?
Christian Audigier: So, where is the flattery and sense behind the fashion?
During the week long fashion tease, I decided to have mercy on them all. Perhaps these artistic clothing designers can’t help but create art. Perhaps subconsciously, for them it’s really not about the fashion. Even so, mŏda artists expressing art on the human body canvas may not always be such a good fashion thing after all.
Elmer Ave: And yet, who am I to be judge and jury I asked myself:
Candice Held” Until I flew “up, up and away in my beautiful, my beautiful balloon”:
Alexis Lamontagna: On the totally tasteless side - we are all trashy sluts working a free for all peep show:
Last time I saw something like that, I was at a West LA night club in 2001. True story! My blues music client was scheduled to play on stage with a well known actor and blues musician. As there was no sound check, he insinuated I take him to a fifty something “sweet hooker’s” house beforehand, which I refused to accommodate. Long story short, the woman was wearing that shirt.
As far as the sheer black blouse; if you are going to purposely pin, do take the time to make it appealing. The highly unflattering way this material is bunched up pulls the sleeves and back forward, thus forcing it to sit horribly around her neck. At least that is what my mentors would say. Shoulder seams need to always sit on the shoulder, which is why they are called shoulder seams!
So Fashion Week LA began last Sunday, but behind the scenes it began several weeks ago. Rather than the usual scrutiny, this year resembled a reality talent show of sorts. Concentrating not so much on the fashion itself but the stars behind the lines, the spotlight focused on” The Hills” star Lauren Conrad, Nicky Hilton, and the Pussycat Dolls.
Lauren has chosen to focus on California chic, inspired from her recent trip to Paris. She pictures you wearing berets, ribbons and bows, lace, and leather gloves.
She calls her Lauren Conrad Collection casual. Other than the accessories, the pants and tops are very Beverly Hills grocery with double coupon casual, along with that dress which makes you look somewhat pregnant, casual:
Meanwhile, The Pussycat Dolls are marketing what else but lingerie:
And then there was sane sista Nicky Hilton, presenting her high-end line NICHOLAI. While a few of her pieces made some sense, this coat dress or dress coat, it’s a “droat” made no stoopid sense at all:
A few pieces I did like, given a modification here and there. Does this mean her high/low end CHICK line will soon be a designer knock-off. But again, it is the detailed stitching and quality of fabric which makes a high-end line also a high-end cost. Most think they are paying for the high-end designer label, which in a way they are. Branding baby, name equals fame. Who cares about quality fabrics and detailed stitching, just slap that name across my ass and I’m queen of the world!
This particular designer line is hard to critique. I would like to say that I liked it, but I really can’t. Actress and wife of rocker Beck, Marissa Ribisi along with designer Sophia Coloma presented their cutting edge line called WHITLEY KROS, fashion best suited for a 3rd Hilton sister cartoon character that prefers to mix “sophistication, rock ‘and’ roll, and poetry.” What? You can see it here.
On a completely Grimm level, what’s up with the Little Red Riding Hood look? The newest trend takes a chic coat or cape, and stitches a hood on it. A hood lined in red, which instantly transforms me into a storybook character! The only place a hood should be stitched on is either a ‘hoodie’ sports garment or a Halloween costume, not an expensive and elegant coat. It lowers the total sophistication of the garment:
Overall it was a good time party with great appetizers, but for the fashion faux paux twist… Although the opening spot is not favored much due to attendance, the closing spot is worth its weight in gold as everyone shows up to bring down the house! This year the favored closing spot was awarded to beloved red carpet LAFW designer HALL, who also brought the LAFW Fall 2007 season to a close:
Life was beautiful; that is until beloved HALL pulled out at the very last minute, leaving an open night slot and avenue for speculation. And you know how much the chi chi crowd loves to speculate! Talk had it that designer Christian AUDIGIER really wanted a night slot, but HALL had snagged the last one. Because Christian failed to secure a night slot, his Audigier’s too hip for the room ED HARDY label decided not to show this year.
By the time AUDIGIER found out HALL had canceled, it was too late to get it together. So this year, top regulars Kevan Hall and Ed Hardy did not show 2008 collections at the Culver City Smashbox photo studios last week.
Factoring in time and itineraries, HALL’s closing slot at LAFW 08 went to the Pussycat Dolls lingerie line, designed by Pussycat founder and Dolls reality TV maven Robin Antin. (Insert clap here) Because panties really do make the world go round!
This year Fashion Week LA should have been all that plus some, but it really wasn’t in both designers and attendance. So many excuses, so many blames…
The designers didn’t have enough time after the holidays to prepare their collections… More designers are cutting back and spending less to show… The economy is in turmoil… Sales are down everywhere… The Hollywood writers strike… Gas prices being what they are… These fashion shows are getting too expensive to produce… Easter came early this month… Because there are too many reality show actors doing way too many non-reality TV related things…Because I/she/he started my/her/their period early…
In the end a few designer pieces stood out but again, perhaps only certain aspects of the garment. Some pieces could have been stunning, but for the flowers and pockets which clearly didn’t belong. Both in fashion as in life, some things are just so unnecessary.
The following dresses I found absolutely beautiful.
- Notice how it flows with the body, while not fully accentuating any certain part of the body. No matter what you are bulging or lacking in, with a creamy chiffon wrap you will truly look and feel like a modern day Cinderella: Else Katz Couture.
- This outfit is also a stunner, but for that obnoxious red flower drawing my attention to her hips. That combined with her in my face nipple action: Coco Johnsen.
- It only takes one clean and classic piece to make the collection a success: Samora.
- Although sometimes, all it needs is a good tweaking here and there to really bring out the classic beauty: Dina Bar-el.
This brings us to the rules of glamour:
- Absolutely no tummy bulges, stomach wrinkles, muffin tops, or wide gaps under the arms and across the chest. Additionally, never wear a skirt so short that you can’t bend over in it and are consistently pulling down. And ladies, never anything so low that your thong is showing when you sit down!
- Purchase your size according to the garment, and not one size smaller to look sexier. Always choose to try both a bigger and smaller size, and compare the fit with your correct size. When trying a smaller size, be aware the material will stretch everywhere to accommodate you. If it gathers and rolls in certain places, you need the next size up. Basically, the material covering your torso should always remain smooth and flat. Smooth + flat = flattering. The less is more rule is the best, coordinating necklace with bracelet and shoes with bag. Too many rings on fingers and toes is a definite no; keep them all coordinating, and never more than five rings at a time.
- Additionally, the no white shoes after Labor Day or before Easter rule is the rule to obey, no matter what they say. Between the months of Labor Day until Easter, the weather is usually in winter mode. Thus the rain, mud, and sleet will soil and ruin your white summer shoes. Street stained white shoes look so unflattering on your feet! Remember, fashion rules were created by your past sista’s for a reason, being to keep you looking good all season long!
- Fashion neither follows nor sets trends, it just simply is, as is classic fashion. The right cut for the correct occasion, with simplified and flattering colors blending together. Please no cherries, fruit slices, hearts, or designer name across your chest. No matter how you like to dress, leave it pleasing to the eye and flattering to your body. Keep it truly tasteful and chic, and you will feel truly tasteful and chic.
After all, picture Grace Kelley wearing a big ol’ glittery BEBE across her chest.
An investment in your wardrobe is essential, classic garments which span an eternity of wear and flattery is an investment in yourself.
Art is fashion, and truly is in the eye of the beholder.
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