Yeeeeeeeee-haaawwww pard’ner, is ya’ll ready for week two of the rootin-tootin reality round up? Summer reality television really is worse than ever and in this week’s segment I’m calling a dawg, a dog. So again this week, pray with me for Celebrity Rehab 2. Oh, back to “reality”.
First up, FOX summer staple, the hip to the hop, not even trendy, it sucks really; hosted by Cat Deely, Star-vehicle “So You Think You Can Dance 4” or as I call it SYTUCD4:
SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE
This was the first time in my life ever visiting the FOX website to check out a show, and I felt like a retard (socially, not mentally retarded) clicking on the SYTUCD4 link, just to find out that FOX hails Deely ” one of the foremost television presenters in the U.K,” but what the hell does that mean? I mean, am I to believe that she is not ‘the best’? The FOX site goes one to say her popularity in America is booming as a result of her huge seasons hosting SYTUCD 1;2;3. What? Why doesn’t SYTUCD4 deserve the best Brittan has to offer, but the bigger question is who gives a crap? A bunch of a-hole judges that no one cares about with names like Nigel Lythgoe, and Tabitha and Napoleon, and like last weeks The Bachelorette, if you want to know their names, or which knuckle-headed dancer is which, go to the FOX site before you get some shock treatment. It’s like when I watch “Deal or No Deal” and root for the cases, and I guess if you were 12 (but probably not), or were born with no legs you might enjoy this show. Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Terry I know; but, what about the ratings, people are watching it, should I?”
Yes, I know but if people did something stupid, like jumping off of a bridge, or voting Republican would you? Listen, truth be told, there are a lot of really good dancers making it through to the next round but I like the audition process because I like to laugh at the people who only think they can dance. Keep watching as inevitably someone will flip over and knock themselves the hell out; or break something but not the record â (the largest simulated dance mat routine that it tried to break on may 19th, at the Nokia theater, in L.A.)
LAST COMIC STANDING
A guy in a chicken suit, the geeks’, girls, boys, skinny white-nerds, and large-black women making Aretha Franklin noises, but LCS is trying to resurrect bad comedy. Where once again undiscovered would-be comics battle it out and bring the funny or more importantly the not so funny. The NBC summer of Gloom is back with yet another installment of the reality competition show Last Comic Standing, hosted by the humorless Bill Bellamy, who sucks ass compared to original host, and producer Jay Mohr. To make the whole thing worse, I still think Doug Benson got screwed last year. Now, I can’t trust the integrity of those laughs. Worse that canned-laughs they’re ‘bought laughs’ as I know it as fact that the LCS producer’s, through the casting company (SRO) has booked people, at $8.00 per hour - cash at the end of the taping â to sit for six to eight hours and laugh, clap and applaud. Even all the “club final’s” to see who will advance are all shot around L.A.
This was a weak show at best and even weaker now as buying laughs seems a smidgen less valid â like it ever was. I immediately saw the judges and asked who the fuck are these people, as former contestants and people with no careers seem contrived, but watch it as you might like it because there are a few really funny kids auditioning and it’s not until a few weeks from now that you’ll be pissed-off watching the funny people leave, and somehow, the others remain. My friend Paul thinks they should change the name to “You’re Not Funny!”
“Adios!”
*** “Last Comic Standing” (NBC Thursday @ 8:00) logo from WWW.NBC.com
*** “So You Think You Can Dance” (FOX Thursday @ 8:00) Photo from WWW.FOX.com
*** top photo by benimoto via flickr.
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