• Break out the candy cigars, Clay Aiken is going to be a Daddy.  I know what you’re thinking and no, it doesn’t sound like he actually did it with a woman.  You can breathe again.   Supposedly this was strictly artificial insemination, using Clay’s super sperm.  The lucky woman?  His friend, 50-year-old music producer Jaymes Foster.  Oh, Clay.  Already on the fast track to Michael-Jacksondom and he’s only 29.  Just don’t name the kid Blanket.  On second thought, please do.

• Angelina has finally given birth to the twins.  The twins girls are Kid 5 and Kid 6 of the Pitt-Jolie clan .  Mom and babies are reportedly doing well.  The names, according to ET-Online are “ISLA (pronounced eye-la) MARCHELINE (after Angie’s mom) and AMELIE JANE (after Brad’s mom) JOLIE-PITT.”  Well, there you go.  Congrats to them and to whomever scores the rights to those baby pictures.

• George Clooney and Sarah Larson have called it quits.  This is astounding.  I can’t believe it.  I wonder what happens now.  Will Larson go the whole reality-show path (she was on Fear Factor) or the starring-in-a-horror-movie route?  Or, she could just show up at events and have her picture taken.  Oh, the possibilities.

• Pete and Ashlee are with child.  Duh.  Yeah, so, in case you were by some chance wondering about this, it’s true.  The couple confirmed:   “While many have speculated about this, we wanted to wait until after the first trimester to officially confirm that we are expecting our first child. This is truly the most joyous time in our lives and we are excited to share the happy news and start our family.”  Yawn.  What?  Did somebody say sumpin’?  I was engrossed in checking my hair for split ends.

• Bill Murray’s wife claims he’s a sex addict.  She’s filing for divorce.  Is that all?  It doesn’t seem to be that poor a quality in a husband, does it?  But, wait, there’s more.  Jennifer Butler Murray, Bill’s wife since 1997, accuses Bill of “adultery, addiction to marijuana and alcohol, abusive behavior, physical abuse, sexual addictions and frequent abandonment,” according to a report on papers filed in a South Carolina court.  With the exception of the physical abuse, is there anything in this statement that’s shocking?  I mean, really.  He’s Bill Murray.  Of course he’s messed up.  That’s like being surprised that Madonna is a diva or Mario Lopez is dumb.

*photo by williac via flickr.

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