• Jaime Lynn done had that baby, y’all!   In case you’ve been in, I don’t know, somewhere remote like the Valley for the last 48 hours, let me just tell you that Brit Brit’s little sis had a baby girl.  Ma and Pa named the girl Maddie Briann, which I thought was so cute until I found out that Brit and Jaime’s brother’s name is Brian.  Why do they all have to be named after each other?  I’m surprised she didn’t name her Lynn Britney Jaime K-Fed Spears or something.  Anyway, mom and baby are doing well.

• David Beckham in his underwear is never a bad idea.  Emporio Armani debuted  a giant mural of a mostly naked Becks facing Macy’s in San Francisco on Wednesday.  Freaking genius. But, why San Francisco?  Bring that hotness down south, Armani people.  Becks is property of LA now (not the Bay Area) and we want to stare at him while stuck in traffic!  Better than that stupid Love Guru poster.

• Kim Kardashian’s latte is more important than yours.  This story cracked me up because you and I both know that here in LA, there is a strict coffee shop code of conduct.  Kim apparently waltzed into an LA Starbucks and cut in line, claiming she needed to get her coffee first because there was paparazzi outside.  For shame!  Seriously, nothing makes an Angeleno madder than having to wait longer than necessary for caffeine.  People go apeshit; I’ve seen it.  Women who wouldn’t blink a fake eyelash if you cut them off in traffic will beat you down with their Prada bag if you come between them and their venti sugar-free non-fat vanilla iced latte with an extra shot .  This is a serious offense, Kim.  You need to get it together, girl.  Unacceptable behavior.

• They won’t let Martha Stewart into England.   Blimey, this rocks.  She has been refused entry into the country because of those little pesky criminal convictions four years ago.  You know the Brits just don’t like her.  I mean, they let Robert Downey Jr. and Paris Hilton in.  Actually, I’m having a hard time thinking of a celebrity that hasn’t been in jail.  Now they have the perfect excuse to ban her smug mug from their country.  We should think of some reason to keep  Ginger Spice out of America.  Surely she’s as annoying as ole’ Martha.  Maybe she has tickets for jaywalking?

• And, speaking of the British, English darling Amy Winehouse has a chest infection.   No, it’s not tuberculosis, as the media have been reporting.  So, that’s good news.  Maybe she’ll lay back and have a little rest and stop giving the press so much fodder against her.  She needs to recover that amazing voice and give us another album!

• Charlie Sheen really hates Denise Richards.  Somehow (I wonder), voice mails that Sheen left Richards in 2005 have been leaked to the press.  In them, he calls Denise many wonderful and uncreative things, including the n-word.  Because it’s bizarre to call someone that and because no one should use that word unless they are a rap star, the world now hates Sheen even more than Richards.  How can this dude be the spawn of President Bartlet (Martin Sheen)?  You know Jon Cryer is just cringing right about now.  He just wants to work, Charlie.  This is the best he’s had it since Duckie.  Please shut up!

*photo by williac via flickr.

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