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It’s a Payneful Life: Nothing’s Ever Open

August 10th, 2008 Written by: Andrew· No Comments

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse, the DMV goes and does this. This week our heroic Governor Schwarzenegger announced that the Department of Motor Vehicles will cease its Saturday morning services. Budget cuts led to the state’s unwillingness to pay part-time and overtime employees so that it could serve its citizens more conveniently.

This is completely backwards thinking; wouldn’t it make more sense to shut down on Monday and Tuesday with a work week that includes Saturday and Sunday? While it’s true that most people would rather get a root canal or be forced to listen to the Scarlett Johanson album than waste a weekend day underneath the blinking fluorescent bulbs of the DMV, that’s also the only time many of us can make it to this unfortunately essential destination.

It may come as news to the government of California, but the majority of its citizens are employed, and their jobs force them to attend work at the exact same time the DMV has its doors unlocked. When we need to stop by in order to pick up one of the 10,000 ridiculous pieces of paper required for operation of a motor vehicle, we can’t do so without sacrificing a sick day, some time off, or a lunch hour to stand in line on floors that haven’t been cleaned since Reagan was governor.

It’s almost a form of entrapment. It’s almost as if the government never wants us to get in to renew our license or registration, keeping us away so that the fines may roll in. After all, with Saturday service shuttered, when will working folk ever again get the opportunity?

I’ll admit that when I first moved to California I drove illegally for six months: I simply never had the time to get to the DMV. I lived in fear of the fuzz every time I went a tick above the speed limit, thinking I may suffer a similar fate to Paris Hilton and her suspended license. Finally, I went to the DMV one Saturday morning and got my license. I was in the clear and hadn’t missed a second of work.

Now that Saturday operations are shuttered, I’ll never again have this convenience. Neither will anybody else. It’s ridiculous. It makes absolutely no sense that something like the DMV should operate during normal work hours.

The DMV is something I’ve always felt should operate in peripheral hours. That is, it opens its doors at 5 o’clock every evening and locks up for the day at midnight, giving those who need it 7 hours of their off-time to stand in line.

These peripheral hours of operation shouldn’t stop with the DMV. Doctor’s offices, banks, and dentists should all open their doors in off-hours, giving the workers of the world what they need.

How many times have we spent our lunch-hour in the dentist’s office, or sacrificed a half-day so we can take care of an error on our bank statement? It’s insane. It seems these operations have set up a conspiracy to keep us out of there doors. Everybody works now, and nobody can ever get anything done because these service offices want to work during normal business hours.

This needs to stop, and the perfect place to begin this cessation is with the DMV. So please, Mr. Governor, rather than stopping service on Saturday, just move the week back two days. Heck, you can even have Wednesday and just give us commoners Thursday-Sunday to obtain our permits.

You might even save some money.

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