In case you missed Project Runway last night, you suck. Just kidding. No worries, I’ll fill ya in. This week’s challenge was to design for a “high powered and glamorous woman.” The contestants wondered who it might be. Stella wanted it to be Sharon Osbourne. “Queen of Rock,” she explains. “She’s a business woman.” But, alas, it’s not Ozzy’s better half, it’s Brooke Shields, or more accurately her character on Lipstick Jungle, that the designers will be creating an outfit for. Brooke reveals that she will be wearing the winning look on the new season of her show. The contestants are given 30 minutes to sketch a design. Then, they pitch their vision to Brooke and she chooses her 6 favorites for the runway show. She picks: Keith, Korto, Jarell, Kelli, Terri and Blayne. Each of these 6 get to pick a partner to work with on the challenge. Blayne chooses Leanne, Keith picks Kenley, Terri snatches up Suede, Korto gets Joe, Kelli selects Daniel and Jarell pretends he’s excited about Stella. The designers get a budget of $150. Yippee Skippee. Here we go.
Once back at Parsons, the gloves come off and people get snippy. Terri and Suede begin fighting immediately over a shirt. Suede looks as if he might cry and Terri tells the camera that Suede must be packing “balls of vajayjay but he needs to work that out.” I’m still not sure what they were upset over but oh, I do adore the funny. Korto and Joe have a row because Joe wimped out and didn’t tell her what he really thought until Tim Gunn was there holding his hand. He apparantly agreed with Tim’s take on her jacket; that it looked like a sweet potato. They have a polite discussion that’s too boring to even relay to you. (No, seriously, it was one of those weeks.) The only real excitement was when Tim popped his head in to tell everyone that because the winning outfit would be worn on national television, there would be no immunity with the challenge. Ooooohhh.
The runway show, however, is very interesting. Brooke Shields, of course, is the guest judge and she seems truly delighted to be there which is refreshing. My Love List is: Keith/Kenley and Terri/Suede. Yup, that’s it. My Hate List is: Blayne/Leanne, Jarell/Stella, Kelli/Daniel and Korto/Joe (but, to be fair, I loved the sweet potato jacket, I just thought the dress fit really weird so I couldn’t make myself put it on the Love List.)
The lowest scores go to Kelli/Daniel and to Blayne/Leanne. Blayne and Leanne’s shorts and top were declared “too casual” and “not sophisticated enough,” by Brooke Shields. Heidi declared that “she looks like a woman that didn’t have a mirror.” But, Kelli and Daniel’s animal print accented corset top and pencil skirt made the judges question their taste level. Michael Kors called it “slutty, slutty, slutty” so I guess he thought it was slutty. Brooke was nicer, admitting that the design she saw on paper “didn’t get executed.” Leanne and Daniel were quickly spared and sent backstage, leaving Kelli and Blayne to sweat it out on the runway. Blayne actually did look quite pale for a change. But, in the end, it was Kelli that was sent home.
The highest scores are given to Team Jarell/Stella and to Team Keith/Kenley. But, who won? Well, Jarell and Stella impressed the judges with their dress, which Heidi admitted was her favorite. “When it came out, I was like, Boom,” she said. Michael Kors called it “chic and good looking.” However, Keith and Kenley won the prize with their lovely flowey skirt and top. Nina Garcia said it was “absolutely beautiful” and Brooke called it “unique.” I agree. It was really pretty and I’m glad it won, although I still think Keith bugs. I’m not sure if it’s the bravado or the bandana but I’m not a fan.
Stay tuned next week when fan favorite Chris March returns with a drag queen challenge. Yay!
*Project Runway is on Wednesday nights at 9 on Bravo. If you don’t live on the West Coast, check your local listings, yo.
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