Money to burn. Time to Kill. People to See. Ideal Reality.
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April 12th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
At the age of 15, I stole my brother’s “Moondance” CD. After listening to it 15 times, I went out and purchased every other Van Morrison album released in the early 70’s. Those CDs became the soundtrack of my youth.
Then I bought some of the man’s later works - from the 80’s and beyond. But the music there seemed confused, overly-sentimental, religious, and a bunch of other shit kids don’t need to hear. So I put a lid on my Morrison spree, and focused on the 7 studio albums he released between ‘68 and ‘74.
Not to dog a musician’s career; Morrison put out some quality cuts in the 80’s and 90’s, but none of it resonated quite so heavy as those early works. And we all know why: beauty prefers youth.
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Tags: Editorials · Reviews · bands
March 16th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
“The Goonies” come together to conquer Dracula and company in “The Monster Squad.” Almost as moving as “Stand By Me” and cooler than “Explorers,” “Monster Squad” pays tribute to all those elementary school dorks who obsess over Stephen King. Penned by Shane Black (”Lethal Weapon and “Last Boy Scout”), the script boasts thick, dark sarcasm and one of the most memorable movie lines of all time (hint: nards). If you’re in the market, mark your calendars. The New Beverly will project this FOUR nights in a row! That’s Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. This week March 19-22. And stick around as “Monster Squad” screens back to back with alien-brain-eating-parasite-zombie classic “Night of the Creeps.”
At the New Beverly (Map). Wednesday through Saturday, 7:30. as well as an extra show on Saturday at 3:55. Tickets at the door.
While we’re talking 80’s absurdity, see “Clue” at Arclight Sherman Oaks (Map).Monday, March 17 at 8:00. Tickets Here.
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Tags: Film · Upcoming events
March 11th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
A mute woman gets raped twice in one night, then goes on a vigilante spree. She kills men, chops up their bodies and drops the spare parts in various trash cans around New York City. Like every good vigilante, she gets shot down in a blaze of glory. “Ms. 45″ is the second best rape/revenge movie ever made (right under “I Spit on Your Grave” and right above “Last House on the Left”). It plays at the Grindhouse Film Festival Tonight: March 11, 7:30 at the New Beverly.
If you’re looking for a more “cultured” experience, the Egyptian Theater pays homage to Italian horror maestro Mario Bava this week. Bava was the director who coined the combination of sleaze and sophistication. He pioneered an era of Italian exploitation cinema from the late 60’s through the early 80’s. His films boasted killer cinematography, penetrating scores, and tons of death and sex-appeal to fill in the blanks. The fun kicks off this Thursday with “Black Sunday:” March 13, 7:30 at the Egyptian Theater.
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Tags: Film · Sport Report
March 8th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
I don’t want to sound rude or anything, but I tend pay attention to fashion trends - particularly the ugly ones. Here’s two of them:
1. Women wearing dresses (or things that resemble dresses) over jeans - Jeans are hot. Dresses are beautiful. But the two come together like sex and death. Most guys agree on this. Yet the trend persists. Even in California. Five years and going strong. And I thought it was just something college chicks did to hide their “freshman forty.”
2. Uggs - Why the hell would you want to wear something that makes your angles look bigger? What happened to go-go boots? They were hot. Uggs are not. Okay … so not everyone dresses for sex. Some people just want to wear what’s comfortable. I hear that. You might as well buy some Birkenstocks while you’re at it.
Tags: Editorials · Fashion
March 1st, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
Remember when action movies were rated R? Remember when Don Johnson was the shit? Phil Blankenship at New Bev Midnights does, and he pumps out the hits. Made to capitalize on the Reluctant Hero 80’s, “Harley Davison and the Marlboro Man” follows Mickey Rourke as a biker with a soul to to bleed. He hooks up with Don Johnson. They tear shit up. The end.
Writer/Producer Don Michael Paul will be present for Q & A. Tonight - Midnite - New Beverly - Tickets at the door, 15 minutes before - Map
Before there were reluctant heroes, there was “Rocky.” He fought for love when all the world wanted was hate, and I think he’s cooler than Jesus. You decide - Arclight Sherman Oaks - Monday March 3, 7:30 - Tickets - Map
And then there was the man who loved to hate, Charles Bukowski. Are you an intelligent alcoholic? Come join the flock for rare Bukowski movies - Wednesday, March 5 at 8:00 - 7 Dudley Cinema - Venice - Arrive Early, it’s free - Map
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Tags: Entertainment · Film · Upcoming events
February 25th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
Film industry trade paper “Variety” introduced it’s own version of MySpace-facebook last week. “The Biz” is a networking site that allows media professionals a place to find work, pitch projects and exchange ideas.
The site is set up like any other: you create a profile, upload a picture, and start searching. There are no prerequisites to join, but participants are expected to list their work history. Thus, if you don’t have any credentials, you’re still at the bottom of the totem pole.
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Tags: Entertainment · General · local news
February 23rd, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
I almost don’t want to post this, because it’ll only make the line longer. But yes, Scott Baio will be present for tonight’s screening of “Zapped!” at the New Beverly. If you missed last week’s column, Zapped is pure 80’s cheese, in which Scott Baio gets telekinesis and uses it to remove high school chicks’ clothes. It plays in a double bill with “Carrie,” as part of The Greats of Roth Film Festival. “Zapped!” starts at 7:30, (but get there early). Baio and Eli Roth will do a Q & A after the movie. “Carrie” begins sometime around 9:30, Tonight, February 23rd at the New Beverly. Tickets at the door.
Also, John Hughes whores take note, “Sixteen Candles” gets the VIP treatment tonight at Cinespace, “an upscale restaurant, bar and screening room rolled into one.” Saturday. February 23rd at 8:00. Tickets at door.
Speaking of 80’s icons, who wants to see our governor demolish the Sherman Oaks Galleria, murder 100 terrorists, and hook up with Chong’s daughter? Check out “Commando” at the New Beverly. Director Mark L. Lester is scheduled to be present for Q & A. And while you’re there, be sure to count how many full-on innocent mall security cops Schwarzenegger murders during his rampage. It’s dreamy. Tonight at Midnite at the New Beverly. Tickets at door.
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Tags: Film · Upcoming events
February 18th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
Three Necessary Industry Reads… detailing the dark side, and the light that shines through:
Upon the release of “Hollywood Babylon,” a New York Times reporter observed, “If such a book as this can be said to have charm, it lies in the fact that here is a book without one single redeeming merit.” Indeed, here is a book documenting Hollywood’s nastiest scandals from 1900-1950. Here’s a book containing portraits of demolished hotel suites, dead stars, and their dead pets. Here is a book that’s been on bestseller lists since its publication in the 60’s. And it’s better than three decades worth of “Us Weekly.”
“The Grove Book of Hollywood” covers more than just scandals. It’s 700 pages of insight from inside: an anthology that spans 10 decades, focusing solely on works written by people who were in the industry (no college professor essays allowed). It’s worth it for the bibliography alone.
Perhaps 90% of all “How-to Make it in the Industry” books are written by douche bags who never make it in the industry. Thus, Joe Eszterhaus blessed us “The Devil’s Guide to Hollywood.” If you need to break into the industry, and you’re not rich, incredibly good-looking, or already plugged in, you need this book.
Tags: Celebrity News · Entertainment
February 17th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
Better than a bag of Pop Rocks. “Zapped!” follows the misadventures of teen loser Scott Baio. While experimenting with THC derivatives in the school science lab, Baio stumbles upon telekinesis. He uses it to undress girls, conquer bullies, and help his scumbag best friend scam jocks and cheerleaders. All the while, school janitor Scatman Crothers gets really high and travels to fantasyland, where he rides a bike with Einstein and flees from his angry wife, who fires salami logs out of bazooka. It’s a stoner’s delight. And yes, Baio’s best friend in the film is played by “Charles in Charge” co-cheif, Willie Aames… back before Aames pulled a Kurt Cameron and became “Bibleman.” Aames’ character in “Zapped!” is pure gold. He seduces the hottest girl in school; the next day, she tells him, “whatever happened between us, I faked every minute of it.” His response: “that’s why it was so good!”
Ahh… heartwarming stuff. “Zapped!” plays in a double bill with Brian DePalma’s telekinetic teen masterpiece “Carrie.” Friday. February 22nd. 7:30. New Beverly. Also Saturday. February 23rd. 3:30 and 7:30.
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Tags: Film · Upcoming events
February 12th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
It’s over. So who won?Nobody, really. The studios gave more than they wanted. The writers got less than they asked for. But the industry is back in action. For awhile.
The final deal cut by the studios will allow WGA members more kick-downs from downloads and web-streaming than they would have received had the strike never occurred. But there are some gripes, concerning a “17 - 24 day, free streaming window” for online content. Basically, the writers won’t get residuals on streaming shows or movies until after that window. But most people who watch streaming content watch it online within the first 5 days of its initial posting.
Anyway, WGA leaders had this to say about the final deal: “Much has been achieved, and while this agreement is neither perfect nor perhaps all that we deserve for the countless hours of hard work and sacrifice, our strike has been a success.†[Read more →]
Tags: Entertainment · Local Politics · News
February 11th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
New Line Cinema has given Michael Bay full authority to produce new installments into both the “Elm St.” and “Friday the 13th” franchises.
Bay personifies Hollywood Today. He’s not a filmmaker. He’s a marketeer. He wants big money, and he wants it now.
Seriously, it’s where the industry’s been going for the past two decades. And I’m not some douche-hole college junkie who hates capitalism. I believe the film industry is, first and foremost, a BUSINESS. However, it’s a business of distributing ART. So there’s a balance, or at least, there used to be.
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Tags: Entertainment · Film · Reviews
February 9th, 2008 Written by: Zane · No Comments
The folks at the Grindhouse always put the best shit on the big screen. “Welcome Home Brother Charles” is the quintessence of 70’s blaxploitation. It follows a conflicted brother (Charles) who gets castrated by cops and thrown in jail on trump charges. Upon his release from prison, Charles manifests a new found manhood. The doctor explains, “His penis has grown to frightening limits!” In one of the most unforgettable scenes ever, Charles’ cock grows about 9 feet in length and wraps itself around the neck of an evil police officer, choking the fool to death. “Welcome Home Brother Charles” plays in a double feature with “Penitentiary.” Director Jamaa Fanaka and actor Leon Isaac Kennedy will be present. Only at the Grindhouse. Tuesday. February 12th. 7:30 PM. New Beverly. Tickets at door.
If you prefer sex-appeal that’s a little less offensive and a lot hotter, consider spending Valentine’s Day with Clara Bow. For those not in the the know, Bow was the original 20’s “flapper” girl. Her persona more or less spawned an era of sexual liberation. And despite rumors that she humped an entire USC football team in one sitting, Miss Bow was an innocent soul: an all-too-human “star,” confined to a time when screen idols were supposed to be deities. Watch her rise, then fall hard in the documentary “Clara Bow: Discovering the It Girl.” Thursday. February 14th. 7:30 PM. Hollywood Heritage. Tickets at door.
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Tags: Film · Upcoming events
