Having now conducted apartment searches in Los Angeles, New York, and Boston, it’s clear to me that every search goes through a few distinct steps:
1) Excitement. Initially, you were dreading the search. But now that you’re on craigslist, looking around, it turns out that finding a beachside condo in Santa Monica with private bathroom and patio will only set you back $500 a month. This isn’t only going to change your living situation - this is going to change your life. Girls are going to be stunned by your new pad - how did you get it? What do you do for a living? Are you, in fact, Zac Efron? You should have moved out of your old place years ago. [Read more →]
This being Hollywood and all, I have to say I’ve been roundly disappointed in my LA cinema going experiences thus far. Let’s review the 3 main culprits:
1) Assigned seating. This is not the first grade here. Let us choose our own friends and sit where we want. We promise we won’t make trouble. My question - do people take this seriously? Do people actually enter a theatre in the dark, use their blackberries to light up their ticket stubs, and then attempted to sign their assigned seats among the masses? What happened to “please move down one”, or best of all, people looking around helplessly for their friends that went into the theatre before them, while everyone else snickers. Let’s not lose one of life’s greatest small pleasures.
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So, after approximately 3 months in Los Angeles, it’s clear that there are a lot of things wrong with the city. First, and most importantly, I have yet to randomly be asked to star in a movie by a cutting edge director or producer while making myself ubiquitous on the Los Angeles streets. It’s sad because I’m actually quite ready for that conversation. Let’s assume that producer is J.J. Abrams. Here’s how it would go.
JJ: [doing a double take after seeing me sitting outside the Urth Cafe eating a ginormous fruit plate with whipped cream]: Excuse me, I know this sounds odd, but do you act?
Me: [not looking up]: I’m acting right now.
JJ: [startled...but impressed] You are?
Me: [razor focused on my next kiwi attack] Yes. In fact, we’re shooting the critical scene right now.
JJ: [looking around] But I don’t see cameras….
Me: [Finally making eye contact, smiling widely] See what I did there?
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Signing up (or paying for that matter) for a Ryan Adams concert is a bit of a risk - will you get drunk / belittling falling all over the stage Ryan (check out this clip of him) or polite down-to-earth play-the-songs and go Ryan?
Happily, audiences at Royce Hall Thursday night were treated to something in between as Adams pummeled through a variety of his catalog with the flair and energy of a drunk man but the poise and musicianship of the stone cold sober. Adams is often criticized for being derivative, and it’s true that hearing his songs can often feel like a “Name That Influence”, but what can be a weakness on record plays as a strength in concert, where he’s able to pepper his set with variety and flourishes that more straightforward artists can lack.
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