Mo’s
4301 Riverside Drive
Burbank / Toluca Lake border
(818) 845-3009
$ 1/2
Ah, the Valley. The strip malls, the… smog… Uh… You guys have an Ikea out there. That’s pretty cool. Let’s face it, the Valley sucks.
That being said, it’s sometimes a necessary evil to venture into the grid-like hades it is (I mentioned they have an Ikea, right? Well they also have a Fry’s).
That and apparently a lot of people live out there, or something. So after hearing all you 818-ers claim time and time again you had something worthwhile to offer (aside from an Ikea and a Fry’s… and Sushi Nozawa), I decided to call your bluff.
After a few recommendations and a little internet research, I settled on Mo’s. The place gets fairly solid reviews online (keeping in mind that the only higher rated burger joints in the area are In-N-Out and Bob’s Big Boy, I shit you not), so I figured “Why the hell not?”
From the outside, the place looks cute enough, despite the faux-retro feel. Lots of wood, mellow decor, it was nice enough inside.
Glancing over the menu, there was a definite emphasis put on burgers, although I have to say the menu felt a little padded. I mean they’ve got some unique stuff that’s definitely worth listing:
- Foggybottom burger: peanut butter and sour plum jam
- O-Solo-Mio: Mushrooms, marinara sauce, mozzarella, and Parmesan cheese
- Frank’s Fantasy Burger: Sour cream and black caviar
- Rose Street Burger: Blue cheese and caramelized onions
And then we’ve got these:
- Avocado burger - Scandalous!
- Bacon Burger - Unpossible!
- Bleu Cheeseburger - can you possibly guess what’s on this one?
Whatever, I know I’m splitting hairs, but they’re about half the fucking menu.
Anyway.
I went there with my father, who owed me one because I accompanied him to Fry’s. I figured a burger and beer were adequate remuneration. And It’s a good thing I went with him, because while I had settled for ordering the “Burger Sauté” (aka caramelized onions - yum!), he was lucky enough to get a specials list, which featured… A Kobe Beef burger. Nice!
We decided to split them, so that I might sample booth. Also, I should point out that they did not come with fries (strike one), they do include a trip to, and I quote, “Mo’s Famous Burger Bar.” Who is said burger bar famous with? Lord only know. As a matter of fact, what is the burger bar? Apparently we’ll find out when our food is ready and someone will bring us to it. How delightfully mysterious! What wonders awaited us there?
Observe:
You’ve got some potato salad, some coleslaw, some pasta salad, some other weird shit, lettuce and tomato for the burger, and some condiments over to the side (pickles, salad dressing, mustard, mayo and ketchup, all randomly placed).
It certainly did not live up to my expectations, however brief they were. And they hide this thing around the corner, so you really have no idea what you’re in for.
So the sides were a bit blah, but what about the actual burger?
They were both sitting on a plate, open-faced and condiment-free, in front of the bar.
Burger Sauté
Kobe Burger. For such a “fancy” burger, it sure doesn’t look like much. But as they say, “Don’t judge a book by its cover, but rather by the crap inside.”
We had opted to keep the Kobe burger as minimal as possible (no cheese, no lettuce and tomato, no mustard even, just ketchup and a touch of mayo) in order to fully savor the quality of the meat.
And let me tell you, it did not disappoint. That was some seriously good meat. I mean for starters, the thing was juicier than a watermelon, and practically filled my plate when we cut it in two. It was perfectly cooked, and just so flavorful. It became almost a chore to eat the “Sauté” in comparison.
Speaking of which, their “normal” burger? Totally run-of-the-mill. Sure, the caramelized onions were a nice touch, but entirely forgettable. Not bad by any stretch. I ate it, and could have eaten an entire one had I ordered only that.
But the Kobe burger is where it’s at. It might even have been enhanced by a slice of cheddar… Maybe.
So where does that leave us? Well the Kobe meat is fucking awesome, and enhances the overall experience, but ultimately as a burger, it only hovers above pedestrian.
Would this burger be enough to keep the Valley from the inevitable nuclear holocaust I will rain down upon it when declared Ultimate Ruler And Uncontested Master of The Entire World™? No. “Wipe that place off the map,” I’ll declare casually, my sequined cape shimmering in the dull light of my underground lair.
If I’m in the area, hungry and don’t feel like kitching it up at Bob’s Big Boy across the street, then maybe I’ll go back.
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